Waiting to Exhale

Dearest Goddesses,

I never realized the sheer genius of the title of Terry McMillan’s book Waiting to Exhale until recently when I actually had the feeling like it had been weeks since I had really exhaled. I’ve had the feeling of holding my breath in anticipation for months now. I went to my tried and true guide Living with Joy by Sanaya Roman and I flipped it open to a chapter on clarity.

When we are faced with change or feelings of uncertainty we tend to lose our perspective on the big picture and only focus on the immediate situation. When we keep our perspective, when we look at our life as one long story instead of a series of disjointed chapters, suddenly the “crisis” that we are facing in chapter 157 becomes the baseline for the tremendous epiphany in chapter 163. (I suppose if my life were like a James Patterson book, I’d already be on chapter 1063 at least…)

But seriously – think about a time in your life when you faced a tremendous challenge – one of those “end of the world” bits. Although you still may look back on that as a difficult time in your life or still think it was unfair, etc. the truth is you survived. It wasn’t the end of the world – and chances are, if we truly look back on the situation, it turned out for the best or provided a needed learning experience or simply proved the old adage that what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.

I’ll share a bit of an excerpt from Living With Joy with you now:

“Achieving clarity involves seeing the larger picture, a longer time frame, a bigger perspective. The larger your view, the clearer you can be…If you are willing to look at yourself as a whole, you can begin t find different levels of clarity around the present moment. It does not mean you need to know the form or where you are going. It means that the larger the picture you hold of who you are, the clearer you can be. If you were to go into the future and look back at today, you could gain a new perspective of who you are, for clarity is brought about by the changing of perspective. Most of you have certain ways you think, certain habits and patterns. Every time you break free and find a new way of thinking, you increase clarity. Clarity is not something that you reach and have from then on. It is an ongoing refinement of your picture.”

I read a quote today on a friend’s facebook page and really connected to it and so I think I will leave it with you today:

'When you come to the edge of all the light you have known and are about to step into the darkness, FAITH is knowing one of two things will happen...There will be something to stand on, or you will be taught how to fly.'

- Patrick Overton

Love to you,

Patty

Anger Management

Dearest Goddesses,

This week is for Sekhmet and although she represents Anger & Rage which can be scary for those of us who like everything to be “nice” – it is an important element to deal with – especially for women.

I watched The Incredible Hulk over the weekend – it certainly wasn’t the greatest movie, but I couldn’t help but think about it when I read through Sekhmet yesterday. By not expressing our anger productively, we end up turning into big green monsters and leaving dead bodies all around us (metaphorically of course!!) Finding ways to deal with the pressure, to alleviate the anger BEFORE we explode is key.

I look back on last week and in the words of U2 – “I got stuck in a moment” and I just couldn’t get out of it. I recognize that I got stuck in my anger and when you get stuck in your anger and don’t express it powerfully and productively – it can get messy, but as women, we tend to turn it inward and it then it can be dangerous.

I find that a sense of humor is KEY to dealing with life’s ups and downs as well as your anger. I’ve posted an image on my blog of a “love note” I shared with John over the weekend!

Well – this week is an inquiry into Anger & Rage and using Sekhmet as our guide, it will be safe and not scary. And essential, I might add as we stop the serial killers (metaphoric of course).

Look forward to your feedback.

Love and light,

Patty

Sekhmet: Anger & Rage

The following is excerpted exactly from The Goddess Oracle, copyright 1997, by Amy Sophia Marashinsky and the illustrations are by Hrana Janto.

_____________________________________________________________________

I burn and fume

and shoot daggers from my eyes

I erupt and roar

(though you’ve not pulled my tail)

my edges are sharp

and I cut deep

my energy is strong and fierce

and my displeasure

needs to be expressed

Though sometimes mild

I can be very intense

Once incited

I am difficult to put out

I am always appropriate

always needed

Don’t try to get rid of me

I need to be acknowledged and heard

I am anger

Mythology:

Sekhmet (pronounced sek’met), the lion-headed Egyptian Sun Goddess, is known as the destructive aspect of the Sun. Vowing to destroy all humanity in a fit of rage, she went on a killing spree. She was stopped by the intervention of Ra, the high God, who put huge vats of beer mixed with pomegranate juice in her path. Mistaking it for human blood, Sekhmet consumed the drink and became intoxicated. When she woke up, her rage was gone. Red in this painting signifies Sekhmet’s scorching, smoldering nature.

Meaning of the Card:

Sekhmet leaps into your life to help you face your anger. Does anger, yours or someone else’s, make you feel uncomfortable? Do you fear your anger because you were taught anger isn’t nice? Or that expressing anger is ugly? Have you repressed or disconnected from it so much so that you don’t know how to express it now? Perhaps you’ve gone beyond anger to rage. Rage is accumulated anger gone out of control. Perhaps you’re in a slow boil all the time and don’t know how to take the pot from the fire. Sekhmet says our anger is part of our power as women. Don’t give away your anger. Learn to express it in a way that it can be heard. Learn to transform it so it empowers and energizes you. Your path to wholeness will be more vital when you make anger your ally.

Ritual Suggestion – Dancing with Sekhmet

Find a time and a place when and where you will not be disturbed and where you can make noise. You will need a drum or pillow or bataka bat (made of foam that is used to safely express anger and rage). You can dance or do this while sitting, whatever feels appropriate for you. Sit or lie comfortably with your spine straight. Take a deep breath and release it slowly on the count of eight. Take another deep breath and sense, visualize, or feel a beach. It can be a beach you know or one that you imagine. Take a slow deep breath, inhaling the smell of the sea and, as you release it, go three. Feel the hot sun on your skin and the cool breeze from the ocean. Call Sekhmet and ask her to be present to help you with and to witness your anger. Sekhmet appears and sits in front of you.

Ask yourself, “Where do I have anger?” and listen for the answer. (It can be a recent anger or a long-buried one.) Sekhmet tells you to search for your anger in a relaxed way, and assures you that if you call, it will come. When you have it, allow yourself to relive the incident in which you felt anger, while repeating the words, “I am angry.” Also say what you are angry about. Sekhmet witnesses your anger and says, “I hear you are angry.”

From your safe space on the beach, either sit or stand, but keep repeating the words, “I am angry”. If you have a drum, beat your feelings of anger on the drum. I fyou choose to beat a pillow or bataka bat, allow your body to feel the anger and express it. Move, vocalizew, dance, or do whatever is appropriate. Above all, allow yourself to feel your anger and express it. Know that it is safe to do so, that Sekhmet is witnessing your anger and loving you for it, that it is yours and you have a right to it. Press deeper into the anger until you feel done or until it changes into something else.

When you are finished, take a deep breath, inhale all the energy you have raised and transformed. Sekhmet tells you what a joy it is to have witnessed and held the space for you to express your anger. You feel energized and refreshed. You think Sekhmet and she asks you for a gift. You give it to her with an open heart, then she leaves. Take another deep breath and, as you release it, open your eyes. Welcome back!